Ju-Ju. WTF is Ju-Ju. I shall endeavour to explain this phenomenon for you.

Have you ever had one of those days where everyone is catching fish, but you couldn’t even manage to catch a cold? Tried every line you’ve got, been through every fly, in every box in your bag, and still bugger all.  Then you obviously did something bad in a previous existence. Used a booby when there was no need to, didn’t buy your round, pissed in a reservoir that you knew was supplying water to Leith(been thinking about that last bit, and pissing in some Hibbies water hasn’t got anything to do with bad Ju-Ju. Its just mean, spiteful, and bloody good fun). That’s bad Ju-Ju, a bit like bad karma, but a million times worse!

The flip side of this is having a cracker of a day when you just can’t do a thing wrong, no matter how hard you try. You’ve got on your boat partners tits so badly that he’s threatening to pitch you overboard because you’re being a really patronising bastard. That’s good Ju-Ju!

So how do you get some of that there good Ju-Ju. Well Andy, and I reckon to have cracked it. Was it some kind of religious conversion, or similar? Nah! It was flukey, really flukey. So what is the secret? Easy, all you need is a box of full moons.

So what are full moons, and how do they work? Weeell, next time you’re heading out on a days fishing, stop off at your local corner shop and buy yourself a couple of boxes of good Ju-Ju, or as the shopkeeper calls them McVitties Jaffa Cakes. Then as the day progresses and the bad Ju-Ju descends, reach into your bag and apply a liberal dose of full moons. Two or three Jaffa Cakes is usually enough at any one time.  This should be enough to turn round a shitty day. We found that to be especially true if once you’ve cast out your line, you grab a full moon, then give it the half moon, total eclipse treatment. I guarantee you’ll get a fish!

NEWS FLASH. Ju-ju is now available by text messaging. Tried it out on the bank at Morton. I ran out of Jaffa cakes midway through the afternoon, I sent Andy a text mesaage, he did the bizzo and sent me some ju-ju by text, and I kid you not I caught my third fish a couple of minutes later!

Big Bob.